Deacon Jude Tam Tran

THE HAMMER, THE NAILS, AND THE HOLES

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” - Proverbs 15:1

Let’s talk about a boy—let’s call him Tim. Tim wasn’t a bad kid. He wasn’t evil. He wasn’t possessed. He just had… let’s say… a very enthusiastic temper.

If emotions were weather, Tim would be a thunderstorm with occasional lightning strikes.

If emotions were spices, Tim would be extra-hot chili pepper—the kind that makes your grandma faint.

He got angry quickly, loudly, and, according to his dad, unnecessarily.

One day after Tim angrily yelled at a door (yes, the door), his father sighed deeply, the sigh of a man who had used up all his patience coupons. He handed Tim a bag—clunky, heavy, and very metallic.

Tim peeked inside.

“Nails? And… a hammer?”

His father nodded like a wise old monk preparing to teach the ancient art of Not Being Annoying.

“Son,” he said, “from today onward, every time you lose your temper, shout at someone, or act like a volcano with legs… you hammer one nail into the wooden board behind the house.”

Tim blinked. “So… instead of yelling at people, I beat up a board?”
“Exactly,” his father said cheerfully. “The board has no feelings. The people you yell at do.”

Tim stormed out to the board that first day.

He hammered nail after nail like he was trying to build a highway.

BANG!
BANG!
BANG!

Neighbors peered over fences, whispering:

“Is Tim starting a carpentry business?”

“Is he building a spaceship?”

“No, Martha… his dad is teaching him discipline.”

By sunset, the board looked like it had been attacked by angry woodpeckers.

Tim’s father checked on him.

“That many, huh?”

“People are annoying,” Tim muttered.

His father patted his shoulder. “Let’s see what tomorrow brings.”

The next day, Tim picked up the hammer… and hesitated.

Hammering was exhausting. His arms felt like spaghetti. His hands hurt. He’d rather apologize than drive another nail into that poor board.

So, he tried something new—he counted to ten.

He took deep breaths.

He ignored his little sister even when she deliberately tapped his arm chanting, “Timmy’s grumpy! Timmy’s grumpy!”

And slowly… miraculously… the number of daily nails decreased.

Some days he only hammered five.

Then three.
Then one.
Then none.

One glorious day, Tim realized he hadn’t hammered a single nail.

He ran to his dad, eyes shining.

“Dad! I did it! No nails today!”

His dad smiled proudly.

“Good. Now we begin the second lesson.”

Tim groaned.

“Wait… there’s a sequel? Like a part two?”

His father held up the hammer again.

“Yes. Now, every time you do something kind—something that makes others smile—you pull one nail out.”

Tim blinked.

“So… be nice, pull out nails?”

“Exactly,” said Dad. “Being kind heals people. Hammering nails hurts them.”

So, Tim began pulling out nails one by one.

He helped his sister with homework.

One nail out.

He shared his lunch with a friend.

Another nail out.

He apologized when he felt himself getting impatient.

Two nails out.

He helped Mom carry groceries without being asked.

Dad nearly fainted.

Day after day, the nails disappeared like magic.

Then finally, one morning, Tim stared at the board and found…

No nails left.

Only holes. Hundreds of tiny, permanent holes.

He ran to his dad once more.

“Dad! Look! They’re all gone!”

His father took his hand and walked with him to the board.

“Son,” he said softly, “you’ve done well. More than well. You learned to control your temper, and you learned how to show love.”

Tim grinned… until his father continued.

“But look closely. Do you see those holes?”

Tim nodded.

“No matter how many nails you pull out, the holes remain. Just like when we hurt others with our words or actions, the wounds we leave don’t disappear easily.”

Tim’s smile faded.

He ran his fingers over the dents in the wood.

Small holes… but each told a story.

Angry words, once said, didn’t completely vanish.

Apologies help. Kindness helps. But scars linger.

He swallowed hard. “So… I should be careful? Always?”

His father squeezed his shoulder gently.

“Exactly. Because you never know which hole might take a long time to heal.”

The Bible isn’t silent about anger and words.

Proverbs 15:1 says:
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

The story of Tim and the hammer teaches us something simple yet powerful:

We can’t control everything, but we can control our reactions.

Our words are nails or gifts. Our reactions are holes or hugs.

We get to choose which.